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How to feed your toddler

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  • Ellyn Satter
  • How to feed your toddler
Child in red shirt eating cereal with spoon.

How is feeding going?

What do you like about feeding?

Is there anything you would like to be different?

What and how are you feeding your toddler?

Your toddler will eat best when you do your jobs with feeding and let him do his jobs with eating. Your jobs are to choose the food, get meals on the table, and eat with him. His jobs are to eat—or not eat. Put him in a high chair or booster seat, lay something on the floor to catch spills, and let him join in with the family meal. He can eat most foods other people eat. Don’t ask him what he wants to eat—he is too little to know.

Smiling toddler holding utensils in high chair.

Here is what to do—and not do—when you feed your toddler:

Bowl of fresh raspberries, top view.

Have meals. Have them about the same times every day. Give sit-down snacks at set times.

Don’t wait for him to say “I’m hungry” before you offer meals and snacks. Don’t let him eat on the run or have drinks all the time, except for water.
Kiwi slices in a glass bowl, top view.

Sit with him and eat your own food. Talk and listen. Be good company.

Don’t feed him instead of eating with him. Don’t ignore him. Don’t make him the center of attention. Don’t watch TV at mealtime.
Sliced bananas in a glass bowl, top view.

Dish out 1 or 2 tablespoons of each food. Let him have more of any food if he wants.

Don’t give him a lot or not enough. Don’t make him eat one food before he can have another.
Diced avocado in a glass bowl, overhead view.

Let him eat his way: fast or slow, much or little, spoon or fingers, 1 or 2 foods.

Don’t hurry him up. Don’t pile and arrange his food. Don’t give him dessert or a toy to make him eat.
A clear bowl filled with cereal loops.

Teach him to behave so you can have a nice meal. Excuse him when he is done.

Don’t put up with bad behavior or make him stay at the table in hopes he will eat.
Bowl of fresh, halved red plums.

Give him lots of chances to try new food at different meals on different days.

Don’t stop making food he doesn’t eat right away.

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    Cartoon vegetables with leafy tops gather playfully together.

    Side-Lying Hold

    1. For the right breast, lie on your right side with your baby facing you.
    2. Pull your baby close. Your baby’s mouth should be level with your nipple.
    3. In this position, you can cradle your baby’s back with your left arm and support yourself with your right arm and/or pillows.
    4. Keep loose clothing and bedding away from your baby.
    5. Reverse for the left breast.

    This hold is useful when:

    • You had a C-section
    • You want to rest while baby feeds
    • You are breastfeeding in the middle of the night
    • You and your baby are comfortable in this position
    Yellow circle with abstract, jagged shapes and patterns.

    Cross-Cradle Hold

    1. For the right breast, use your left arm to hold your baby’s head at your right breast and baby’s body toward your left side. A pillow across your lap can help support your left arm.
    2. Gently place your left hand behind your baby’s ears and neck, with your thumb and index finger behind each ear and your palm between baby’s shoulder blades. Turn your baby’s body toward yours so your tummies are touching.
    3. Hold your breast as if you are squeezing a sandwich. To protect your back, avoid leaning down to your baby. Instead, bring your baby to you.
    4. As your baby’s mouth opens, push gently with your left palm on baby’s head to help them latch on. Make sure you keep your fingers out of the way.
    5. Reverse for the left breast.

    This hold is useful when:

    • Your baby is premature
    • Your baby has a weak suck
    • Your baby needs help to stay latched
    • Your baby needs extra head support
    • You and your baby are comfortable in this position
    Cat playing with butterfly in a garden.

    Clutch or “Football” Hold

    1. For the right breast, hold your baby level, facing up, at your right side.
    2. Put your baby’s head near your right nipple and support their back and legs under your right arm.
    3. Hold the base of your baby’s head with your right palm. A pillow underneath your right arm can help support your baby’s weight.
    4. To protect your back, avoid leaning down to your baby. Bring baby to you instead.
    5. Reverse for the left breast.

    This hold is useful when:

    • You had a C-section
    • You have large breasts
    • You have flat or inverted nipples
    • You have a strong milk let-down
    • You are breastfeeding twins
    • Your baby likes to feed in an upright position
    • Your baby has reflux
    • You and your baby are comfortable in this position
    Peach circle with abstract shapes radiating outward.

    Cradle Hold

    1. For the right breast, cradle your baby with your right arm. Your baby will be on their left side across your lap, facing you at nipple level.
    2. Your baby’s head will rest on your right forearm with your baby’s back along your inner arm and palm.
    3. Turn your baby’s tummy toward your tummy. Your left hand is free to support your breast, if needed. Pillows can help support your arm and elbow.
    4. To protect your back, avoid leaning down to your baby. Instead, bring your baby to you.
    5. Reverse for the left breast.

    This hold is useful when:

    • Your baby needs help latching on
    • You and your baby are comfortable in this position
    Smiling peach character waving cheerful hello.

    Laid-Back Hold

    1. Lean back on a pillow with your baby’s tummy touching yours and their head at breast level. Some moms find that sitting up nearly straight works well. Others prefer to lean back and lie almost flat.
    2. You can place your baby’s cheek near your breast, or you may want to use one hand to hold your breast near your baby. It’s up to you and what you think feels best.
    3. Your baby will naturally find your nipple, latch, and begin to suckle.

    This hold is useful when:

    • Your baby is placed on your chest right after birth
    • You have a strong milk let-down
    • You have large breasts
    • You and your baby are comfortable in this position